Hello, my name is Jessie.  I’ve lived with my two humans now for over 365 sleeps now.  I think that’s just over a year in human speak.  My two are okay and not bad to live with.  Thankfully, they aren’t too stupid and they  are open to being trained.  Obviously, I have to be patient and gentle with them and – I’m happy to say – we’re getting results.  They are learning to let me off the lead a lot more so that I can stretch my legs a bit.  The deal is that I have to go back to them when they call me.  Fair enough!  My two have also learnt that, if I’m going to ‘heel’ when we go for walkies, they need to be less protective of the doggie treats.  A lot, lot, lot less protective.  I want more, more, more treats!  The very health conscious amongst you need not worry.  I like to exercise very, very much so I burn off the calories.  I’m as fit as fiddle.  In fact, modesty prevents me from saying that I look in excellent shape.  But, if modesty didn’t prevent me, I would say that I’m in that thing that is even better than excellent shape.  But modesty  does prevent me, so I won’t.  I also notice that my humans seem to look a bit more, uhm, shall we say sleek than before I came to live with them.  Politeness stops me from saying that they needed to lose a bit of timber but, if it didn’t, I would say that they could do with losing even more of the ‘relaxed’ muscle.  But I can’t, so I won’t.  All this stuff I’m not allowed to do or say! Very frustrating.  Not right for a free spirit like me.  So, all in all, my coming to live with my humans has been a win, win situation.  I imagine that they are very, very thankful.  Well, wouldn’t you be?

Anyway, my male human has pleaded with me to do a dog blog for his site.  No doubt he believes that my opinions and an account of day-to-day activity are of global importance and should be a matter of public record.  Very sensible of him, makes a change I suppose.  It was quite pitiful to watch him beg me to sign up for this.  I hope he appreciates how my star power will brighten up his offerings immensely.  However, my dog blog comes at a price.  As an astute businesswoman I’ve negotiated a salary of five biscuits a blog post.  Not unreasonable, I think, when you realise what I bring to the table.  His original offer was three biscuits.  No chance.  Business is business, you know.   You’d be absolutely right to say that my dog blog is worth ‘big biccies’, geddit?  Big biccies!  Ha, ha.

Today, I’ve got my happy tail on.  It’s waggling to a happy beat.  It usually does.  You see, I’m a dog bowl half full type of gal.  Look at the bright side of life and all that.  Of course, the only thing better than a half full bowl of food is a full full bowl of food.  As you can already probably tell, I’m a bit of a foodie.  My humans say that I’ve never met a meal I didn’t like.  Well, I haven’t.  Still a bit cheeky though, don’t ya think?  But I wouldn’t want you thinking that food is all I think about.  Oh, no, no, no!  That would be a mistake – oh, did I hear someone say steak! I never miss steak if there’s any on offer.  Uhmm…oh, sorry, just got a bit side tracked there.  Oh, what was I saying?  Oh yes, while I have – shall we say – a healthy appetite, I don’t just think about food.  Oh, no, – no way, amigo – I also think about walkies, having my tummy tickled, playing with my friends and chasing balls in the park.  Not necessarily in that order and not necessarily all at the same time, of course.  I’m – actually – very flexible about the order of things; but – possibly –  a lot more more rigid on the quantity of things.  Only lots and lots will do.  A perfect day should have all those things.  Oh yes, I also enjoy meeting new doggies and humans.  Pressing the flesh and meeting and greeting is very important for a friendly, out-going doggie like me.  I suppose I just like to bring sunshine into other people’s lives.  I just care too much, I suppose.  So you see I have a very broad range of interests which I want to share with you, so I may as well blog about them.        

Anyway, writing these blogs, going for walkies, and having my morning meal takes it out of me, don’t you know?  A little snooze before more walkies and treats, I think.  Till next time.  Love, Jessie X…

P.S.  I found my humans through Battersea Dogs and Cats Home.  You can see other doggie divas that are looking for a home at www.battersea.org.uk .

Note: this blog was originally posted on ‘today let’s talk about…’ at http://todayletstalkabout.wordpress.com under the title ‘The Jessie Chronicles: diary of a Doggie Diva (part 1)’ on 5 September 2012.